blacksundae

For 2 instances of the word “shit” and 6 instances of the word “zombie.” [via Eat Our Brains]

UPDATE: Much better. Now it’s an R for five fucks, two hells and a crap.

I’m trying to set up a Twitter feed that is updated automatically by the RSS from this blog. Here goes nothing…

UPDATE: Bingo! It works. If you can receive text messages on your phone, you can now get updates whenever there’s a new post on blacksundae!

blacksundae just received a very nice writeup at Mefi User Sites, a blog dedicated to describing and reviewing the personal sites of MetaFilter posters.

I’m working on a re-design and things may get a little wonky. A lot wonky, actually. The site will still be functioning, but it’ll look like crap.

UPDATE: Still working. I’m reverting to the old layout while I take breaks.

If you click on the “contact” link at the top of this page, you’ll get a little form you can use to send me a message (it sure beats putting my spamable address on the front page). On occasion, it channels me messages from friends and people who stumble randomly across the site (who usually say things like, “Great blog! Keep up the good work!” OR “You rock! I’ve told all my friends about you, and I’ve subscribed to your feed!” OR “While most right-thinking people are wrong, you, most assuredly, are right!”).

Lately, however, I’ve been receiving messages from what seem to be bots. That is, automated “commenters” that generally shit spam into my mailbox. These new messages, however, are not advertisements, but seem to be random lines of experimental poetry. Dad? You mentioned a while back getting something like this. Did you ever figure it out?

To fill everyone else in, I have compiled a bunch of these messages into a single prose poem. Keep in mind, every paragraph that follows is the entirety of a single message.

vridge, who was down there f r tin minyits wanst an spoke very highly an

it began to show itself there among the little wooden houses. t is a road hewn out of the rocks. he giant apoleon carried it through the backbone of the earth. he eagle, apoleon s bird, flew like a living armorial crest over the gigantic work of the

small yacht belonging to the merchant lay, just unladen, near the bridge of boats. tto found aren and the young lady from olstebro sitting in the arbor. omewhat

distinct streets and quarters, so had they also here. he street which led to the market place, and which in every day life was called the hoemaker treet, answered perfectly to its name. he shoemakers had ranged their tables side by side. hese, and

were colored with a sudden crimson, which was immediately afterward supplanted by a deathly paleness his hand

acknowledgments for the honor they

find out my real sister will have proof in hand of the truth will show myself as a brother will care for her future ring to me her baptismal register bring to me one only attestation of its reality and that before eight days are past ere is

demands his right replied tto, and pressed the man s hand. hings go, doubtless, well with you, orten hraenseu he whole cart full of eels, and some smoked carp t is also good to meet with you, r. tto. pon the

Brilliant, yes? Any thoughts? Is this the internet finally becoming sentient, Terminator-style, and expressing its first thoughts and emotions? Will we ever know?

Where to begin? Well, first I’d like to say a few things about suburban Texas. As some of you may know, I spent a few weeks with some very kind relatives in Katy, TX, just outside of Houston.

One thing that struck me was the total lack of sidewalks in the neighborhood where we stayed. No sidewalks. None. I can only assume they atrophied. “Who needs sidewalks? That’s what cars are for.” I found it very confusing. If you walk in the street, you’re… well. You’re walking in the street. Like a tourist in the Quarter. But if you get out of the street you’re walking on somebody’s lawn. Judging by the general neatness of lawns in the area, I think that might be a no-no. What to do? Well, I generally didn’t leave the house (as is reflected in the sheer number of my blog posts from that period).

I was also fascinated by all the subdivisions in the Houston area. There are subdivisions in New Orleans, don’t get me wrong. Hell. There’s even one in Algiers Point. But NOLA is a backwards little burg when it comes to subdivisions, compared to Houston at least. Do you like subdivisions? Go to Houston. Houston is where subdivisions go to die.

Or maybe subdivisions are formed in the Houston nebula, then slowly spread across the country until they attach themselves to the outskirts of other cities. What you see in Houston is just that initial density prior to distribution.

It occurs to me that it would be extremely easy to put together an online Random Subdivision Name Generator. Three words each. The first two would be chosen from the same list, which would be made up of nature words. Geographical features. That sort of thing. Woods. Mountain. Valley. Creek. Oak. Canyon. Nothing negative-sounding, so “sink hole” can’t be in there. Same thing with more technical words. “Subduction zone” just doesn’t roll off the tongue very well.

The last word would be some highfalutin variation on “houses.” Estates. Villas. That sort of thing. Click a button, get a name.

• Mountain Creek Estates
• Oak Canyon Villas
• Prairie Lake Manors

You get the idea. Anyway, that’s all for now. The next episode: Berkeley. That’s gonna be freakin’ hilarious.

P.S. Josh & Christine! Thanks for taking us to Half-Price Books. I shit you not, the day after I got to Berkeley, one opened here. Crazy.

Yes, I’m still a member of the living. Sorry for the lack of posting, but my internet access has been kind of spotty. All that’s sorted out, and I’ll be trying to make up for the gap. Stay tuned.

“What Would Blacksundae Do?”

You can enter any URL at the SonicWALL, a content filtering service, and it will spit back a classification… Porn. Violence. Arts/Entertainment. Etc.

blacksundae? “Category 37 - Religion”

I shit you not. Here’s their definition of the “Religion” category (emphasis mine):

Sites that promote and provide information on conventional or unconventional religious or quasi-religious subjects, as well as churches, synagogues, or other houses of worship. Does not include sites containing alternative religions such as Wicca or witchcraft (Cult/Occult) or atheist beliefs (Political/Activist Groups).

What exactly is an “unconventional” religious group if not Wicca? You’ll notice it’s a cult. Snake-handling? A-okay. Wicca? CULT!

I’m assuming the filter just searches for keywords, and I do use lots of religious expletives. Anyway, long story short, I’m in the same category as catholic.net and gospel.com!

I just received three really strange email messages. No subjects. The text for each was the phrase “fuck you” repeated over and over and over again. No caps. No punctuation. The supposed sender was fuck@you.com.

Now, I’ve seen “fuck@you.com” listed as an address by comment trolls before, but it’s not a legit address. There doesn’t appear to be a “you.com,” either.

Any thoughts on this? Is this a troll (lacking in rhetorical skills) using some sort of hackerish trick to create false sender information? Is it a virus (there are no files attached)?

I wake up this morning, and this is the first thing I find when I bring up gmail. Hell of a way to start off your day.

UPDATE: If you’ve read the comments on this post, you’ve seen that my blog-buddy The Retropolitan received the exact same email (and posted about it as well)! Like him, I don’t feel quite as special.

I did a WHOIS search on the email, and it came from Lycos-Europe.com. I sent a message to their “abuse” email address to give them a heads up. I kind of feel like a rat, now. It clearly wasn’t a virus, so… No harm, right? Maybe I’m being too understanding.

I just realized that my two previous posts both contained the construction “that just screams ‘[blank].’” I’m incredibly embarassed. To be fair, I didn’t write them at the same time or anything. Still… Please don’t think less of me.