blacksundae

AP:

A Roman Catholic school board in Ontario ordered the popular fantasy book “The Golden Compass” taken off library shelves at dozens of schools Thursday after receiving a complaint about the author referring to himself as an atheist.

Similar concerns prompted a Catholic organization in the U.S. to urge parents to boycott a movie version of the book starring Nicole Kidman.

The board for Catholic schools in Ontario’s Halton region said a complaint was lodged after British author Philip Pullman stated in an interview that he is an atheist.

Read on. Notice the book, which is at the very least dismissive of Christianity, doesn’t seem to be an issue here. Publically saying that you are an atheist is enough to get your book pulled from shelves. I expect better from the Canadians.

In the U.S., the Catholic League has criticized Pullman’s trilogy for bashing Christianity and promoting atheism.

Shocking! Disgusting! How dare a book advocate a philosphical position! Next I bet Pullman will invade foreign lands and force the people there to “convert” to atheism at the end of a sword.

I know the whole lolcats phenomenon has gone past “funny” and into “played out,” but here’s the thing: once things get old, they become absurdly funny.

[via boingboing]

from the pen of Oliver Wendell Halliburton
to the tune of “Abdul Abulbul Amir”

The thugs of our President seldom are hesitant
At doing things not straight and true,
But the dirtiest imp to do dirt for the Chimp,
Was Gonzo Gonzales (Abu)!

He’s a thug. He’s a hood. He makes Ashcroft look good,
A fixer of John Mitchell hue.
He can outdo Ed Meese in the matter of sleaze,
He’s our Gonzo Gonzales (Abu)!

‘Way back when ol’ Dub was called Governor Shrub
With a drunk driving record or two,
His old DUI rap disappeared in a snap,
By the hand of Gonzales (Abu)!

He’s a thug. He’s a hood. He makes Ashcroft look good,
A fixer of John Mitchell hue.
He can outdo Ed Meese in the matter of sleaze,
He’s our Gonzo Gonzales (Abu)!

Ready to sing along? Find all eleven verses here.

Yes, it’s me, the elusive Non-Shannon, offering up another lukewarm plate of 2005’s leftovers. Yay, everybody! It’s more old horoscopes! Shannon’s contributions really shine through in this one:

Wednesday the 16th (March 2005):

TAURUS: Just because it’s “cool” to drink Corona doesn’t mean it won’t give you the “green apple splatters.” Tonight: Don’t drink the Kool-Aidâ„¢.

PISCES: You may want to revise that text message. Your numerical abbreviations are unclear. 2NITE: U8 the Q8T!

ARIES: Please step away from the vehicle, hands on your head. And don’t make any sudden onomatopoeic utterances. Tonight: Don’t forget the safe word.

CAPRICORN: Shine on, you crazy diamond. Tonight: Make a deal with Satan. I mean, make a meal with seitan.

SCORPIO: Good ‘eavens! This is a sticky wicket! Tonight: Very good, then! Sporting trousers!

CANCER: You may feel like a paper tiger with feet of clay, jousting with straw men. Don’t worry, though. You’ll come out on top. Tonight: Beware of awkward mixed metaphors.

SAGITTARIUS: In the parched outback that is your cranial capacity, an errant wallaby traverses the red wasteland, dreaming of litchis and popsicles. Tonight: Didjeridon’t.

LIBRA: You overhear a friend pluralizing a genera name (i.e. “velociraptors”). You kill them for this transgression. Tonight: Combine the Suzuki method of acting with the Suzuki method of music. This will cause the world to end.

GEMINI: Sorry, but stirrup pants are not going to “come back” “in a big way.” Tonight: Suddenly scabies!

AQUARIUS: Only wussies use turn signals, right? You shitcock bitchfucker!!! Tonight: Easy come, easy go. If you know what I mean.

LEO: ROAR? Tonight: Maintain your image as “King of the Jungle” while at the same time being a thieving, scavenging savannah-dweller.

VIRGO: Combine your love of poetry with your skills in applied robotics in order to create a Frankensteinian, verse-spewing automaton. Tonight: Stop. Hammer time.

Is my timing good, or is irony an everyday thing in Vermont? I arrived this morning, and here was the front page story in the Burlington Free Press:

UVM’s Republican club folds

There was a certain irony in the recent demise of the College Republicans at the University of Vermont. What ultimately proved to be the club’s undoing was an appearance on campus by a national Republican heavyweight: Newt Gingrich.

The amount of Newt’s 2005 honorarium was “undisclosed,” but apparently it was more than the kids had.

Steven Colbert played the White House Correspondents’ Association Dinner, and bombed. Why is that important? Because he called Bush, the Republicans and the so-called “liberal” media on all the bullshit they’ve put us through. Not much laughing in that room, so he bombed in that sense.

He did all this, and it’s not being reported.

I heard something about Dick Cheney going hunting the other day. I hope he had a good time.